My Daily Battle

I’ve been in quite the Battle the past few weeks.  My pain levels have limited my ability to complete most tasks that I do in my Daily Life.  It has been quite a while since my pain has been so debilitating.  I live with pain on a daily basis yet it is rare that I have pain so debilitating.  Most of my trigger points have been activated and causing sore muscles and joints.  It is rare for me to not be able to do my walks or to do them with my joints and my muscles in my legs bothering me so much.  I always love my walks and the past couple of weeks I haven’t been able to complete them in a way that I normally do.

The issue with this when it happens day after day after day it is a struggle to keep yourself emotionally and mentally fit.  My body gets so tired and worn out from the pain.  At the two week point it is so hard to not just mentally and emotionally give in.  I did give in for a short period of time a good cry and a bit of yelling at the wall, then I had to get back to the battle.  The battle itself gets overwhelming.

Im feeling a bit better today.  Trying not to overdo myself. With God in my life I have had some joy through the pain.  I just try to remember how much He loves me.  I know it is ironic.  Why do I, or would I love and be loved by a God who has made me so sick?  I don’t completely know why God has given me or others this sort of affliction.  Yet what I do know is when I walk in His Love and Grace.  I also realize that He loves me more than love was created to be.  Knowing all of that brings me joy and helps me to want to keep fighting this dreaded Fibromyalgia.  I strive to walk in His light.   Like any soldier who is in battle like this we do wane in our mental and emotional state.

I am working as hard as I can to hang in there and do what is necessary in my life.  It is the only way I will survive this life.  Others have worse so I also do try to be grateful every day that God has spared me of so much worse things In this life.

Ten Things of Thankful

This evening the Ten Things of Thankful is really a good exercise for me.  Most of my family is sick with this weird virus that is going around right now.  It always makes me feel better to put together a gratitude list.  I am hoping this helps.  It always seems when I get sick it throws me into a flare.  My legs seem to be bothering me the most this time. It is that horrible nerve pain at the surface of my skin.  Do not touch me, is my mantra when this happens.  I am hoping I will start to feel better in a couple of days.

I think this week since I am not quite up to Par I will mostly just be doing a list.

1.  I am Thankful that God has blessed me with Creativity to make something from nothing.

2.  I am Thankful for all the amazing gifts I received this year for Christmas.

3.  I am Thankful for my friends who stick beside me through thick and thin.

4.  I am Thankful for my Sister.  I think if we lived closer together we would be joined together at the hip.

5.  I am Thankful for a new printer I am sure I will be over my head with it yet I am excited to learn how it works.

6.  I am Thankful to be instructing one of our local MOPS Group to put together 3 Greeting Cards on Friday Morning.

7.  I am Thankful for a Warm Bed to sleep in.

8.  I am Thankful for Our Electricity this past year it hasn’t gone out but a couple of times for no more than an hour.

9.  I am Thankful for my three Beautiful Grandchildren and so proud of them as well!

10.  I am so so Thankful for my son and his wife who are so kind and loving to me.

Hopefully I will be feeling better next week and I will be more in the writing mood.